Not Okay

In response to the #notokay movement that’s underway (thanks to Donald Trump’s audio tape from 2005), I feel compelled to tell a few stories of my own. While none of them are traumatic – and I feel grateful to be able to say that – all of them are, to varying degrees, #notokay.

Closing Time

When I started writing this weekly blog a year ago, I didn’t know exactly what I was getting myself into. Like many new beginnings, one scarcely ever does. There was a vague sense of needing to find a repository for pieces of writing I’d begun over the years, and some semblance of legacy for my […]

Don’t Quote Me On This…

Hi, I’m Cathia, and I’m a quotes junkie. I have been collecting quotes for 20+ years and have bits of paper and sticky notes stuffed in a bulging and horribly inelegant filing system. A few years ago I began assembling the scraps and pasting them onto full size cardstock paper just to reduce the chaos…but […]

It’s All Greek To Me

What is the one thing you don’t want people to know about you? One of my biggest sources of shame is having not been asked to join a sorority when I was in college. I am both ashamed to tell the story, and ashamed of my shame over something as frivolous as being left out […]


A priest once told the story of a little boy who wanted to talk to his newborn baby brother alone. As the parents watched from the doorway they heard the five-year-old say to his brother, “Tell me about God…I’m starting to forget.” And that’s how I sometimes feel about marriage. Five years out of my […]

Growing Pains

I’m honored to introduce my guest blogger this week, Julia Friou. She is 18 years old, a freshman at UNC-Chapel Hill, and my oldest daughter. Here is her take on her first three months away at school, in her own words. It’s either sadness or euphoria. Profound loneliness or immense ecstasy. For me, move-in day […]


“There is no real conversation without vulnerability,” says poet, author and lecturer David Whyte. What comes to mind when you see or hear the word vulnerable? A newborn baby? A hatching turtle on the beach at midnight? Pitching a progressive idea to your curmudgeon boss? Saying I love you for the first time? Whatever the […]